Yodakage Kira
"Just like the simulations." - Random Clone before making the greatest and last mistake of his life
Posts: 42
Pronouns: he/him
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Post by Yodakage Kira on Sept 11, 2020 7:08:49 GMT
Review for Bookclub.
I read the first two chapters, and here's what I think about them.
First and foremost, the narration style is both a blessing and a curse to read. It allows for witty commentary like in chapter two regarding Falkner, and thats very good for making people laugh if thats what they're looking for. But its a curse in that its hard to take seriously, its hard to get invested with such a distant approach to the Pokemon. Personally, I don't like that sort of way of writing even though it can be done well, like how you've done it.
Secondly, the build up to each fight is great. It's the closest I've gotten to being able to see training montages happening in my mind with very little detail surrounding them, and it has to do with your wording that ties it all together nicely.
Thirdly, while the fights themselves aren't exactly how I like writing and reading them. I had a similar experience in that there was enough detail for me to at least picture what happened on a much larger scale. I at least salute you for doing that.
I'd say that overall, the first two chapters I read were great. Good job.
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