I Have No Idea What I'm Doing (May 2018 Rock the Block)

Okay, first off, Tiki is an adorable name for a Cyndaquil.

Second off, the narrator is adorable. I think where it really hit me was the National Park segment. While the narrator's tone of voice isn't entirely kid-like, there's just something cute about the image of them sulking like a petulant child because they somehow managed to miss the deadline for the contest (which is announced, no less). But it's really more than that. It's also how many times the narrator brings up Ethan (not only to lay down the idea that the guy is a Big Deal but also to establish firmly that they know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they're not anywhere near Ethan's league). It's how the narrator's parents are ecstatic that their child finally has a pokémon, but they keep going on in the first scene about how they weren't actually that passionate about the idea of caring for one. And it's that thread of thought throughout that last scene where the narrator goes on about how they don't actually know what they're doing (finally looping back to that question and giving it the most meaning out of all three scenes) but cautiously settle on the idea that: 1) that's okay and 2) maybe being a trainer isn't so bad. In other words, I think what I like most about this fic is how subtle and not-subtle it is about painting the narrator as being this under-confident, mediocre kid who still needs to sort things out. They're not a hero by any means, and more than likely, they won't be one.

And ... actually, that's a pretty interesting thought to have. Like, as many heroes as there are in canon, not everyone can be one, but we never really talk about the kids who don't turn out like Ethan or Red or what-have-you just because people who save entire regions are, by default, more interesting, to put it frankly. But what this fic does is play with the slice-of-life genre to dip into the entire idea that being a trainer doesn't mean having an epic adventure with your pokémon. Instead, it's all about those uncertainties about whether or not you're doing it right (by which I mean literally anything), coupled with the friendships you make along the way (no meme references actually intended there).

One thing I will note, though, is that I kinda feel like the tone is off somehow. Like, the story doesn't feel like it's being told by a ten-year-old but instead by someone slightly older (thirteen at the youngest). I can't quite put my finger on why, admittedly, but I think it's something in the verbiage (i.e., at times, the narrator describes things in ways a ten-year-old probably wouldn't, like by saying "having said that" or describing the way they're swinging their legs off the cliff), combined with the slight hint of sarcasm and bleakness you don't really grow until you're in your teens. The narrator still works (and, actually, it would probably be even more amusing/poignant if they were older than Ethan when they start out), but yes.

Also! I do admit that part of me almost wanted to see more action. We get a good look at the narrator's frame of mind throughout, sure, but I almost feel like things would be more dynamic—or, in other words, that the narrator's lack of confidence in themselves and general uncertainty would be more evident/impactful—if we could see their conversations with Krise or their desperation to catch that scyther, maybe in tandem with their inner monologue. This may be personal preference, but I've always found that conveying deep or heavy thoughts like self-frustration and whatnot tend to be more dramatic if you lean into body language, physical reactions, and so on more so than simply narration, you know? Like, it'd feel like a character's lack of self-confidence has more plot relevance (or at least potential for consequence) if they're shown acting on it in real time.

But! Again, those are more subjective points. Other than that, this was an adorable fic, and I'm kinda left hoping the narrator seizes their journey and grows from here.

Aw, this is really cute. And best of all, Jax critiqued the things that I was going to critique, which leaves me with the much more pleasant task of telling you what I liked about it instead of going on about the ways it could be improved. I'm actually even a little torn about the lack of action, as it happens – I agree with Jax that it would have been better to see more dramatisation of some of these events like catching the scyther, and I think her suggestions about ways in which you could do that are excellent, but on the other hand, I also kind of think that that lack of action sorta works in your favour. This kid isn't Ethan. They aren't Krise, either. They're just a kid, wandering Johto without aim or purpose. And in a way the inaction of the story underscores that: it's so still, so calm, so unmoving; it feels the way the air does on a summer's day when it's so hot your thoughts themselves seem to get slow and sticky, and that's good for a couple of things. One is that it really helps cement the summer holiday kind of atmosphere you evoke with this fic, where to be a trainer is to be released from obligation, almost from society, into this strange aimless space where the only direction is what you can come up with for yourself. The other is that it makes the comparison between Krise and your narrator much more pointed. Krise is decisive, active; she happens to things, and things happen to her. The narrator, as previous reviewers have pointed out, is not that: like I said, they're just a kid. They're the other 99% of trainers. So in a sense, that nothing at all happens to them is very apt, because that's who they are. And the fact that they come to realise that nothing need to happen to them, that just being here without a purpose is normal and okay, is very satisfying.

But … that said, you know, it would be cool to have more action, more gesture and drama. And I do also have to agree with Jax that the narrator feels a little older than we're asked to believe they are. I guess the story is kind of torn between its action and its structure, in a sense; if it were more sharply pointed, if you could figure out a way to dramatise the drama-less life of this trainer, then that would probably be the ideal – although I can't lie, that's kind of a tall order. For what this story is, I think it's pretty successful. It certainly succeeds in cultivating the atmosphere it wants to cultivate, for sure.